So my little sister went into psychosis and just got back from her second stint in inpatient. Her delusion was that God wanted her to kill me. She didnt do anything luckily, she told our parents that god told her to kill someone but didnt specify who and she was distressed, they took her to the hospital and she was in inpatient for a month. She recently had another relapse, only now she realizes it was wrong thinking but we're not sure if she means "morally wrong" or "incorrect". It really hurts because normally we are really close and get along well and I still love her shes my sister but it really hurts that someone I care about so much would even think of something like that. SHE EVEN HAD A FUCKING PLAN INVOLVING A KNIFE AND A PILLOW TO STIFLE MY SCREAMS. SHE HAD A PLAN. and it hurts so much emotionally.
My school social worker and I are looking into transitional housing for me. Since I don't feel safe in my house anymore(even though I have latches on my door now because of this crisis). She says I would be considered at risk for homelessness even though I'm living at home still. I feel scared, FUCKING TERRIFIED, about it. I'm deciding what to pack, and its like I'm leaving my home and this isnt what I would've chosen for myself had circumstances permitted otherwise.
I can't even think of it as a new adventure because of the circumstances surrounding it.
Im stressed with all this and finishing high school and getting shit sorted out for college. My budget project for economics class isn't justa project for me, it's a possible reality. Im scared. I'm fucking scared.